This post is sponsored by AMAZE. All opinions are my own. How To Talk To Your Kids About Boobs, Boners, & Sex #MoreInfoLessWeird
You can’t believe I wrote that, can you? Yeah, it’s not exactly my style. But, it is. It really is. You know why? Because I am a mom. I am a parent. When it comes to the serious parenting issues, such as talking about sex, I have to be on my children’s levels. I’m the one who has to adjust my approach. I have to find a way to make sure that my words are not wasted. I have to make sure that my children are informed. I don’t get to shy away from this part of parenting. I can’t ignore it. I can’t let them just figure it out on their own.
When my oldest son was about 7-years-old, he started pressuring me to tell him all about sex. I’m not talking about the birds and the bees. We’d already discussed that, and we kept the conversation going. Or, so I thought! My conversation wasn’t good enough for him. He had real questions. He had real comments. I’m talking about sex, porn, and masturbation. All. Of. It. He didn’t know all the words, but he knew bits and pieces of things that made my head spin. How could my baby be asking me these questions? I always knew it’s important to talk to your kids about sex, but this was way beyond my comfort zone. I didn’t feel equipped. I thought I was going to screw it all up, for sure!
One day, when he was in the 2nd grade, he refused to stand up with the rest of his class, upon the request of his teacher. I asked him about it and he said, “I had a big ol’ boney boner! I don’t want people seeing my bones! I get a lot of boney boners! I like them. Wait, do you think I’m a man now?”
I could have died! (and if he ever finds out I shared this little story?) I spent the next two-years looking for books and guidance about how to talk to your kids about the real stuff. I’ll never forget the time one of my mom-friends told me that she had to let her son know that he should trim his junk, so he would properly maintain his hygiene. Another mom told me she had to tell her son to stop ejaculating into the towels! She hooked him up with a year’s supply of wipes and paper towels, and just for precaution, she made sure he had his own towels, and they were not shared with siblings. Again, I almost died! I didn’t even know that was supposed to be said! It was hard enough that one day I made my son practice putting condoms on a banana, and I intentionally kept making them break, so he would see that they can do that. It was all too much! I finally found a very comprehensive book, with pictures, real-stories, and all the topics that made me more uncomfortable than I had ever been in my life.
It was much easier with my second child, and hopefully it will be even easier with my 3rd, 4th, and 5th! I got my period when I was just nine-years-old. I got boobs. Now, not only do I have four sons, but I also have a daughter. My youngest three children are six-year-old triplets. They’ll be seven soon! Whether I like it or not, I have a lot of real and hard conversations ahead of me! This time around, I have more help and resources.
You have to talk to your kids about, everything. Check out AMAZE.org. You’ll got free access to #MoreInfoLessWeird
Amaze.org is your go-to resource about critical sexual health subjects for modern Pre-teens, Teens, Parents, and Educators! One of a parent’s most difficult obstacles in modern-times is keeping up the pace with the digital world. Kids have more friends than ever before. They are talking about everything. They are hearing everything. They are seeing everything. They need our guidance. No matter how strict your digital media rules are at home, it’s impossible to shelter our children from digital influence. Even if your child has never touched a smartphone, most of their friends have. Even in absence of access to digital devices, altogether, the culture of pre-teens and teens has already been influenced. We have an opportunity to embrace our role in their sexual and health education. Talk to your kids.
Kids between the ages of 10 and 14 are already experiencing puberty! Here is a great video you can share with your pre-teen that explains the crazy journey they’re about to take! Also check out the schedule of new videos planned for release between now and January 2017! Talk to your kids.
Here are four important tips for talking to your kids about, everything!
It’s fine to teach proper terminology, but also use the words they are most likely to hear!
Practice. Practice. Practice. Get comfortable with Amaze.org materials and topics, so you truly can be a source of more info that’s less weird. (One reason these kinds of conversations can be weird is because parents often give bits of information, unintentionally leaving too many gaps. That can create more questions than answers, for kids!)
Remember that kids are curious. It’s typical. It’s okay. So, be willing to answer their questions!
You’re doing just fine. Keep telling yourself that. It’s true!
Do you have a funny story about a time you had to talk to your kids about, everything? Share them in the comments!
By: Alicia Gonzalez